Up until about half an hour ago, today was a good day. This afternoon I have been in the oxygen tank for about 75 minutes. I think it is starting to help increase my energy levels for a couple hours after my session, which is brilliant!! I have met a lady that also uses the oxygen tank that has ME and today we had a good chat and bounced positivity off of each other. I came away from my session feeling really positive and determined and also with a slight increased energy level than usual. At that moment I felt like I was battling ME head on with a strong mind.
Now, just a few hours later, I am full of frustration (and pain). I was invited by a friend to take part in a pub quiz with some friends and wanted to go along and join in. I was picked up and taken there and was enjoying myself but was suddenly overcome with tiredness and pain. I had to ask my Mum to come and collect me as I wasn't well enough to stay and therefore could not take part in the quiz. I am so frustrated that I cannot do the things that I want to do. I could not sit down in a chair and answer a couple of questions. I needed my bed and to be in a comfortable position and I will be asleep very shortly, I am sure.
I have had a busy day compared to usual but I still find it very hard to accept that I cannot do all of the things that I want to do. I have to pick and choose the activities that I take part in, however I find this very unfair and frustrating. I want to be "normal" and be able to do what I want, whenever I want. I often think that I have accepted my illness, and I think I have to a certain degree but clearly I have not fully accepted it otherwise I would not be writing this post!
In the mean time I am going to try to work more on my acceptance,
Take care and try to accept something in your life that you cannot change,